“Teaching always requires permission.” (p. 246) How does this land with you? When was the last time you asked permission? What were the circumstances?

“Kings as they’re called in the Stages of Development, won’t tolerate being emasculated as much as younger men. They have a rock-solid sense of themselves and won’t put up with being diminished that way.” (p. 247) How does this relate to the men in your life? What feelings come up for you when you read this?

Knights focus on adventure, Princes focus on building, Kings focus on providing. (p. 247)

In order to be with a King (provider), you have to be great at receiving. (p. 247) How does this land with you?

There is one thing providers have in common: they are accountable.

When you are accountable, you have to be judgmental. (p. 249)

“By the Provider being accountable, they see the outcome as dependent upon themselves. This means that they need - everything they need - is crucial to the result being produced and the family or tribe being provided for.” (p. 250)

This makes their needs “critical and urgent.”

“This is why we took the detour for Delicious Sexual Partnerships. Most women have no idea how much the life-giving interplay of sexuality and sensuality supports men in being their best selves. It is why withholding sex is one of the most effective ways to Frog Farm. And why being a sexual partner is part of the Queen’s Code.” (p. 252)

A man relates to his needs as critical and urgent. If you are someone he considers himself accountable for, someone he provides for, he will relate to your needs as critical and urgent as well.

Need is in the Hero Language. Make it clear what you need, and why. (If you aren’t clear he will keep providing what he thinks you need.)

Note the practical wisdom about how to tell a man what you need on p. 256 (Make an appointment: reassure him that he is not in trouble)